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Home

The Word of Ungod

Ungod Home
Ungod's Brevity
Sayings 1 & 2
Saying 3
Sayings 4 & 5
Saying 6
Saying 7
Saying 8
The Word of Ungod

Excursions Near the Temple of Gloom
or
How I Found Ungod

While romping through the highland jungle near an archaeological dig in the mountains of South America (yes, years ago I played Indiana Jones, so to speak), I stubbed my toe.

On a rock.

A remarkably smooth rock, in fact. As I checked the surface for the remains of my toenail, perhaps thinking it could be reattached with a little tape, I observed some oddly invisible, mystic characters on the edge of the stone.

Retrieving my slightly rusty trowel, I quickly dug the stone out. Since it was located in the disturbed soil of the surface there was no need to do more than note its coordinates in the forest. Eagerly, I began to study the mysterious markings on the rock.

The ruins of Machu Picchu, an ancient Inca city discovered high in the mountains of Peru in 1911. The Rock of Ungod was not found here.

I said earlier the characters were invisible, and indeed they were, except to the faith of an atheist. When I showed the stone to my archaeological compatriots, they were unable to see any markings or letters at all, since they lacked atheist faith. Indeed, their jealousy of my ability to see characters on the stone quickly led them to dismiss me from the team.

Their ignorance and intolerance perturbed me greatly. Nonetheless, I quietly retreated to my trailer and, inspired by Ungod herself, began the monumental task of recording and translating what would later become known as the Rock of Ungod.

The result you see before you, referred to variously as the "Word of Ungod," "Ungod's NeoMystic Teachings," or the "Ungod Commandments." I present them together with my own explanations, for I have discovered that by simple, sincere atheist faith, I've gained the uncanny ability to comprehend exactly what Ungod was trying to say.

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© 2000 by Dwight Lyman

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